G is for Good God Your Kid is Ugly j/k LOL

You gotta love Facebook. OK, well you don't have to love it. But, you do have to be on it. If you aren't you should know that we make fun of you regularly because you are not one of the cool kids like us that sit at home on Friday and Saturday nights glued to our screens to see what other people are doing so we can live vicariously through them. Unfortunately, they are on Facebook too, so we send comments back and forth about what other people are doing and what we wish we were doing, you know if we weren't on Facebook.

While many people refer to Facebook as the Devil's Playground, and I have to be honest, I'm not sure that they are wrong, it also has a lot of good aspects. It gives you the ability to reunite with friends that you have lost touch with, reconnect with lost loves (Ha! Look at the butherface he ended up with) and keep in touch with family that you don't see. Although the family thing is a double-edged sword.

"Hi, Aunt Gertrude. I am really sorry that I wasn't able to come over Saturday and watch the DVD of Uncle Leonard's colonoscopy. I heard you made your famous liver and marshmallow green bean casserole. You know how sorry I am that I missed that! I just can't seem to shake this cold. Huh? What's that? Oh, you saw the pictures on Facebook of me doing Jager shots and jello wrestling at Mardi Gras this weekend. Yes, I do have a lot of beads. No, no, that wasn't my boyfriend. Just some guy I met. No, I really was sick. That's what happens when you take Ambien and cold medicine... yeah, I'll come over right now. Yes, I'll stop and pick up some marshmallows."

See double-edged sword. Oh, and if you are wondering what a butherface is let me give you an example:

Wow, that girl has a rockin' body, but her face looks like a Pitbull's chew toy!

Facebook also gives you the opportunity to see photos of your friends and family and comment on them. Have you ever seen somebody's baby and thought wow, that is one ugly kid? Of course, you can't (or shouldn't) say that so you write something like, "Wow, he looks just like his daddy."

Well, some people have found away to say exactly what they are thinking without incurring the wrath of the proud parents. They simply add what I refer to as a dis-qualifier. For example:

Hope she's smart 'cause Good God is that kid ugly!  j/k

Well, at least now we know what it would have looked like if Mr.and Mrs. Frankenstein had a baby.LOL

That's your kid?!? It looks like something my cat coughed up! LOL j/k 

By simply adding "j/k" (just kidding) or LOL (Laugh out Loud) people are saying exactly what they are genuinely thinking, but are able to play it off as a joke. And it doesn't have to just be about ugly kids. Say your friend tells you to go online to look at her new, awful haircut that she loves. You have the ability to say the following:

Wow, not everyone can wear green hair. And what'd they cut it with? A weed-whacker? LOL j/k 

For the first time, you can be completely honest because if someone gets all pissy about it, all you have to say is I wrote j/k. What are you getting so mad about? It makes them feel like the jerk. You can't do that if you are face to face because then this person will know you weren't j/k and as a result may punch you so hard that they give you a but-her-face. Then I will be forced to make comments filled with j/k and LOLs under your picture about what a loser you are which I will have time to do because after all, it is Friday night so we know I will be at home on Facebook so I don't miss out on everything that is going on with the other cool people. I just have to stop by Aunt Gertrude's for some marshmallow casserole first.