Seriously - WTH?

Calling out the stupid...and boy is there a lot to call out.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

C is for Colonoscopy Sweepstakes?

I am really glad my blog is called Seriously WTH? because I swear you can't make this crap up.


About 2 weeks ago, maybe more, maybe less. I have no concept of time. Well, actually I do, it's just my memory that sucks. Anyway, I was watching TV and a commercial with Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne came on that went something like this:


"Ozzy? 
Yeah? 
Do you have a secret fantasy? 
Yes. I'd like to fly to New York for a colonoscopy."


Ozzy "The Prince of Darkness" Osbourne
pimping a colonoscopy?
Obviously, I thought I had heard it wrong. Then I saw the commercial again with Ozzy still pining for his fantasy colonoscopy. My first thought was that we, the American people, were getting punked. Well, actually that wasn't my first thought. The first thing that came to mind was, hey,whatever kinky sex thing you want to do in your own bedroom is your business. Whatever turns you on, man. But for the love of God, don't go on National television, talk about it and put that image in my head. 


Once I found out that it was a real honest sweepstakes, I decided I needed to further probe the issue. So I looked into exactly what the prize package was and this is what I found:


"Enter the CBS Cares Colonoscopy Sweepstakes! If you win our grand prize, we'll fly you to New York for three nights in a luxury hotel, watch the sun rise over Central Park, then kick back, relax and enjoy a complimentary colonoscopy! So what are you waiting for? You can't win if you don't enter. Visit cbs cares.tv. CBS cares. Making your fantasies come true."


Seriously?!? Kick back and relax while we shove this thing up your ass? Talk about a sweepstakes I don't want to win.


Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne
Now, I appreciate the sentiment. Ozzy encouraged Sharon to have a colonoscopy and that ended up saving her life. I even think it's kind of cool, albeit incredibly odd, that CBS is doing this and calling it a sweepstakes. But what's next a pap smear or  prostate contest? What kind of strange ass sado masochist came up with this idea and what network executive upon hearing it went, "Oh yeah! Dude, that's good. We've got to do that!"


So to those of you that are reading this post and thinking, "Awesome, that's always been my secret fantasy too! I wonder if I could still enter?" Sadly, the answer is no. The contest ended March 31st. And that's too bad, because my guess is there probably weren't many entries and I'm thinking you would've had a pretty good shot at winning. I bet that's a prize that people don't go in on an office pool. How would you split that? 


I have to go see my doctor now. Not for a colonoscopy, but for some type of drug or shock treatment that will get this image of Ozzy and Sharon's colonoscopy bedroom sex romp out of my brain!


Click on this link to view the commercial: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WvRFRMJff-E


Tomorrow's post: D is for My Drug Addicted Dog.





45 comments:

  1. Another of the many perks of getting older. Uncomfortable medical procedures and musical stars from your era become old and pathetic.

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  2. Yes, and it is pretty upsetting when you see people that use to jump up and down like maniacs now walking to the stage with a cane. At one point they had to wear earplugs to protect their ears from the loud music. Now, they are almost deaf and can barely hear it.

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  3. I imagine contestants included the early bird crowd at Denny's. 'Cept they prolly should used someone less rock and roll to advertise. Who's that guy that keeps selling Lincoln Mutual?


    Visiting from A to Z.

    Rena again!

    prose-spective.blogspot.com

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    1. Good morning, Rena:) I don't know, because all I have is the Allstate guy in my head now (and yes I said that in the Allstate voice).LOL

      They should use someone like Alex Trebek. Hey, why doesn't Pat Sajak do any commercials? Or let's get some women in there! Betty White? Susan Sarandon? Mary Tyler Moore? Marlo Thomas?

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  4. I thought this commercial was fake when I first saw it.

    I have an award for you on my blog.

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    1. Awesome! Thanks:) I also thought the commercial was a joke. What a peculiar thing to give away!

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  5. HA! I am still stuck on "You had to PROBE the issue" LOL!

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    1. LOL You are the first person that picked up on that! That makes you the smartest:)

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  6. Wow. Um. Just. Wow. I'm not sure what's more disturbing to me... the idea of the contest or the Osbournes hawking it?

    ~Lynn

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    1. I know, right?!? For some reason, I get this image of this person about to be put under for the procedure and the last thing he sees is Ozzy dressed like a doctor with his crazy eyes and holding the "apparatus." AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

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  7. Okay...you win. What are you winning? The Weirdest Post I Have Ever Read Award. xD

    I loved it!

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    1. LOL I would like to thank the academy. The Osbounre's and CBS for providing me with this material. My parents for raising me to be completely out of my mind...

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  8. Was the advert shown on April 1st?

    new follower,
    mood
    Moody Writing

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  9. Welcome to my blog ! I think it first aired at the end of January/beginning of February. Depending on the response, I'm thinking it is going to be a yearly thing...you know, unless the person that "won" the last one sues them for invasion of privacy or something.

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  10. It's not the colonoscopy that's the killer. It's the medication you have to take beforehand.

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    Replies
    1. I think it's the idea of it all that freaks me out. Blek!

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  11. Here by way of A to Z, and boy am I glad! What a great blog, and I loved this post!! I'll be back!

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    1. Welcome Judy! Thanks for checking me out. Glad to have you as a reader:)

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  12. I thought the same thing when I saw that commercial... Wow, just wow. Love your blog, you gained a new reader, especially your header photo.

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    1. Thanks and welcome, Lori:) As if the whole concept of colonoscopies aren't creepy enough. Then to have Ozzy peddling them... ummmm, I'll pass.LOL

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  13. You seriously make me LOL with every post. LOVE IT!!

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    1. Good! I think life is too short (or long) to be taken so seriously. If I can make people smile and make their good mood better or their bad mood subside for a minute, I'm happy. They say laughter is the best medicine. I like to think of myself as everyone's Zoloft;)

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  14. Hey Shay, Sorry so vacant lately. I will get to your A to Z. I promise.

    I love how you said you had to "probe" into this further. Did you mean to leave off the little whatever the hell marks on either side of the word? That was brilliant.

    Also, I have not had one yet, but am probably overdue in age for one, but from what I understand the colonoscopy is all about getting some of that Michael Jackson drug.

    BTW, I saw Oz live in the 80's. It's hard to make fun of that rock star.

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    Replies
    1. I did leave them off on purpose. I was interested in seeing how many people caught it. Congrats on picking up on it. I figured my little Barfly would!

      I agree, Ozzy rocks:)

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  15. Am I the only one who now needs to see Ozzy do a music video about a colonoscopy? I am aren't I?

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    1. I have to go with yes on that one Emily. Although if he paired up with Keith Richards and did a colonoscopy/prostate exam video, we might really have something. Hmmmmmmm

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  16. Okay, so you're a porn star that likes colonoscopies... is that a thing in porn?
    Hmm...
    Well, at any rate, I'll follow along and see what happens next.

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    1. Oh, I don't like colonoscopies. Well, I've never actually had one, but I have to think that it is not something I would add to my top 10 list of things I enjoy.

      Shhhh, about the porn star thing. Don't want to lose my credibility as a serious writer (Yeah, right!)LOL

      Welcome aboard this Crazy Train. I'm glad you are following:)

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    2. Wait! This is the Crazy Train! >looks around wildly<
      Jane! Get me off this Crazy Train!

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    3. Oh no,once you get on this Crazy Train, there is NO getting off! It's kind of like the Hotel California. You can checkout anytime you like, but you can never leave.

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    4. I'm sure there must be a way... Even if I have to jump. Even if I have to jump while the train is going over a bridge over a huge gorge.
      Right? Right?

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  17. No kidding. That ad gives me the creeps, but who else but Ozzy could pull it off? I'm trying to visit all the A-Z Challenge blogs in April.

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    1. I know, right?!?

      Thank you for stopping by. I'm trying to do the same. There are just so many!

      I try to check out everyone that leaves a comment or becomes a follower for sure. Then I see who they are following and I also visit A-Z to check out some of them as well.

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  18. It's too bad the contest is now closed for entries. My father would have loved it.

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  19. Ha! Think I saw that ad while watching "The Talk" on CBS one afternoon. Actually, the Colonoscopy is not bad, it is the preparation for it that is terrible. Whoever won it, could not enjoy the day before it, because of all the time spent in the bathroom...ha.
    Interesting post. Ruby

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    1. I like to keep my readers on their toes;)

      Well, at least they had a "Luxury hotel" to spend their time in the bathroom on the day before.LOL

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  20. Now this is an image I'm not going to be able to get out of my head. Thanks for sharing. No, really :-)

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    1. LOL, Sorry Sarah, but this is an image I do not believe I should have to bear alone;)

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  21. Seems like a waste to be in a shmancy hotel doing bowel prep...ewww. Or are you supposed to arrive all clean and ready to go, I wonder. This cop,Mercian had me refusing to believe it was for real!

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    1. Please don't call me out for being an idiot on my first visit just because I cannot control my autocorrect! That should've said this commercial had me refusing...

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    2. Hahaha Gotta love autocorrect. I won't call you out. To tell you the truth, I didn't know what the heck you were saying. I thought you had a cop friend named Mercian that told you it wasn't real.LOL

      Speaking of autocorrect, have you ever been to that website. Hilarious!

      Welcome to my blog:)

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  22. So who won the colonoscopy sweepstakes? I entered, but I guess I didn't win. I'd like to know who did?? (cjhb1234@yahoo.com)

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    1. I don't know! I looked it up, but they never said. Maybe they didn't have any entries.

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